A Long Intermission

For all of you who have been patiently (or impatiently?!) waiting for me to finish South England’s castles since mid-March, when I covered Buckinghamshire’s castles in one take, I thought it would be a good idea to let you know what I have been up to all this time while you’ve been waiting for an entry on Berkshire’s castles. To be honest, I’m stuck on the vastness of Windsor Castle and I’ve been enjoying a brand new tome about it since mid-year when I checked it out from the library and perused that for forty-two days! I finally decided to get my very own copy for my birthday! Everyone forgot me this year but myself, so I decided since it came down to this I’d make the gift a veritable treat! 

 https://www.press.uchicago.edu/ucp/books/book/distributed/W/bo27433235.html

     As it is, with all its fabulous diagrams, maps and photos (plus paintings) which I’ve been basking in like a kid in Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, the information is absolutely superb. All castle lovers and Royalty Magazine subscribers should get a copy of this as soon as possible or at least by Christmas. For those who are fascinated with the history and evolution of castles, especially those which have been preserved and rebuilt authentically, this book is an essential textbook extraordinaire!

     As much as I’d like to impart all the information, (which would be impossible, by the way, without rewriting the book) I’m going to give you all a Christmas gift of an entry exclusively on Windsor by Christmastime, hopefully, which will give you a true desire to get up off your couch and go visit the castle no matter where you are at, presently, on earth. How does that sound?

    

Prince Harry’s mid-May wedding helped the work, thus far, tremendously because I taped the entire wedding on the day from beginning to end- all five and a half hours of it!- starting at 3 a.m. Watching those long shots of Windsor Castle from great heights gave me a clear idea of true scale for a visit. Maps in the book facilitated my curious notating of areas throughout the site, to view and venture exclusive of the well-known and toured areas, inside and outside the walls. I have vowed to myself that Windsor Castle will be on the top of my list when I begin my England go-sees and site inspections. Be sure that this is not necessarily because Windsor is the castle most associated with the Royal Family but more because it is a true prototype for many English castles, as diversified as they are quite often. None can match it in size or increase but nearly all of them follow its basic pattern and layout.

     I also spent a good part of the summer reading Queen Victoria’s diary from 1862 to 1882. It is a treasure trove of getting her personal notes on numerous castles of Scotland. Apparently, she and her prince consort Albert were enthusiasts of all things Scottish. This was written at a time that she had lost her husband and was carrying on without him. Her attitude throughout is solemn but not without great anecdotes and adventures. I knew of many castles she visited and/or stopped to view prior to reading the journal but there are quite a number I’d never heard of which are off the books! This will give me more impetus to dig in and start working on Scotland’s castles. Her own, Balmoral, was purchased by her in 1852 and still stands today in marvelous shape. It has been a Royal summer retreat ever since.

     My six-month long interim of studying, researching and reading off line in 2018 has given me an immensely new perspective to continue my England work with a refreshed interest. It’s times like these that I am very content and feel very lucky that I became interested in castles at such a young age. The internet put wings on my favorite subject but there’s nothing quite like trying every dish and flavor on the menu and ruminating on the splendors of each one. How else does one know what is truly a favorite? Still working on that? - you bet!

Blissfully,

The Castle Lady

Sultry September

While the eastern states have been getting hit with incredibly bad weather all this year, Denver has been breaking or matching high heat records that make trees wilt. Old sol decided to give us a brief break at the beginning of this month- particularly around my birthday in the first full week- but it’s been back to 90 + days for about three weeks and only broke today with primarily 60 degrees. Our high today was 72. I’m looking forward to winter about now. Phew! I was ready for a break!

     Meanwhile, I’m dealing with an early grape harvest- the earliest I’ve ever known since Mom grafted a piece of Grandpa Walters vine from the old country in the yard. That comprises one large section of prize-winning grapes from Burgundy which stretches across 100 feet of fence line and I’ve already grabbed a sizeable enough batch of those for myself to make a gallon of juice! It is great tasting, full-bodied and sweet as can be without a single granule of added sugar! Concorde grapes like these are loaded with antioxidants and give you energy along with improving vision! The other 75 feet of vines are newer additions added more than a decade and a half past. If you happen to be lucky enough to live in the Athmar Park section of Denver you can mosey on over here and get some for yourself. Just make sure you call me first to let me know you’re coming. Bring a raccoon trap with you and I’ll give you a gallon of juice free. No kidding. Wascally wacoon!

http://evelyns-nailsforlife.blogspot.com

 

     Top agenda for me this summer was finally getting my hair done and needed it badly when I had it done on my birthday. I don’t know how anyone else feels about it but getting my hair overhauled gives me a new lease on life. It’s right up there with teeth whitening, a new handbag, new car or a whole new wardrobe! For others it may be getting a full set of nails after having them off for a long period of time but for me, that’s business as usual, of course. It’s one of the constant perks of being the best nail tech on the planet, if I have to say so myself. It speaks volumes that I wouldn’t consider getting my nails done by anyone else unless I’m out of town or in another country. Pedicures are another matter. When you have to massage your own feet something gets lost in translation.

     At any rate, I’m up to my elbows in too much to do, once again. Sometimes that’s great but along with the heat I’ve lost momentum and back in the proverbial molasses trying to paddle my way out. Before this week’s up I’m going to have all the invasive, dead or out and out tree stumps removed from my yard to make way for some changes and brand new additions to the yards. I want to do a small kitchen garden next year and I need bare and fallow ground for that! I tore out weeds this year as tall as myself all over my property and I’m still bagging them! This is no joke. Last May all my free ground was bare except for soil and it is once again but I’m going to have to figure out a way to protect whatever I plant. Those flower bed carpets don’t work, by the way. Just a warning! 

      Survival of this summer has entailed trying to figure out how to get a bunch of reading done so that I can get on with my castle writing. I feel stalled when, as a matter of fact, I’m really just trying to fit too much into a day and that never works, you know. There are only so many hours in a day and reading used to be the bulk of it. Now I have to try to read and peruse books like Windsor Castle: A Thousand Years of a Royal Palace  (which is 526 pages of text, diagrams, photos and paintings the castle contains along with magnificent trifold page maps of the upper and lower wards) in a matter of days with one hour left per day to actually sit down with it. All I can say is that hour is golden and wouldn’t give it up for anything. Finally, a book that does justice to a Norman castle!    

      I think I’ll hire someone to pick those grapes. How does a dollar per pound picked sound? Like Peter Piper picked a peck of grapes? I thought so.

The Castle Lady

Review of A Higher Loyalty

Truth, Lies and Leadership

by James Comey

Books are the treasured wealth of the world and the fit inheritance of generations and nations.

 – Henry David Thoreau

     Very seldom do I pick up a book to read and not want to put it down until I’ve finished but A Higher Loyalty kept me riveted to the pages. Not one word is extraneous and it is written in such a way that you know from the start that an important conclusion is around every bend in the breakneck narrative. If you’re expecting political fodder you may as well stay away from it but occasional humor throughout kept me hooked on what felt like a journey into the unknown. There is an educational tone to every part of Comey’s indictment on what has been and is currently going on at the White House and how these most current events are affecting all the branches of United States Government. Surprisingly, most of it is more about character, professional deportment, moral values and being ethical and truthful. It became obvious to me within the first hour of reading that the information contained in its pages were written with the welfare of American citizens in mind- specifically, people on a personal level. Comey also has lots of answers for United States citizens and is much more straightforward, honest and explanatory than anything you’re currently going to get from the Trump administration.

    

Two key chapters in the book, 9 and 10, covers classified data and misplacement of it concerning Ed Snowden (who I now consider to be a criminal and traitor to our country) and Hillary Clinton’s e-mails which were found to be low level classified and sent to people who had government clearance for said data and therefore deemed not prosecutable after two separate and thorough investigations by FBI agents under Comey’s direction. I didn’t understand much about classified information prior to reading this book but applaud James Comey for taking the time to put it all down in black and white. Now I know for certain what I only supposed or wondered about for a long time. By the time Hillary was interviewed about the e-mails, which was after the first investigation, it was ascertained that she told the truth about her handling of the e-mails and cleared herself of any more investigations prior to the election. Even though a second investigation was carried out after the interview it revealed nothing different than what had already been reviewed.

     Besides getting James Comey’s life story thus far, his book gives us a true window into the world of the FBI without giving away a trace of classified information. We get to see the shaping of a life into an FBI director’s world which Mr.Comey keeps bereft of political bias out of expected protocol and proper deportment of his own. He explained in detail how that affects and sometimes complicates the work of all FBI personnel who he recounts with full respect and appreciation. Not once does James Comey make cheap shots at anyone in connection to his work with the FBI, or previously as Assistant U.S. Attorney (New York and VA), deputy attorney general during Bush’s administration and after eight years working in the private sector, appointed as Director of the FBI midway into Obama’s administration.  He doesn’t dignify anything that has come out of the mouth of Trump since taking the White House by repeating a single word of his, on or off the record, except where he had to clarify dialogue that occurred between the two of them on several occasions. This was despite his numerous and required attempts at avoidance. He reiterated himself several times about this issue, first to Trump and then members of Trump’s staff, of the necessity of keeping the FBI protocol when once and done should have settled the question. (Whatever else has been said of Trump I will say that his ignorance is sticking out like a sore thumb. The man only knows how to fire people. Abruptly.)  

     A Higher Loyalty encompasses revealing information about the years prior to and after 9/11 and the past two years, specifically, for all Americans who voted (once) and stood on the sidelines waiting to see the outcome. I stopped reading the book, for the space of about a month, to think about this last election and the behavior I’m seeing from the so-called chief. (I hesitate to call him a president.)

     When questioned about elections it is often discovered that American people make their political and voting decisions based on inconsequential things instead of educating themselves about the issues and the reputation of the people running for office. In order for your vote to have its true value you must do more than scratch the surface on current events and issues. In an environment of haste, which our country and the economy suffers from, now more than ever, it is a recipe for disaster not to get as informed as you can- not just about the issues but the candidates who propose to do something about them. Indeed, the candidates must know what the real issues are and specifically if they will have the power and/or ideas to be able to implement solutions which make sense and work for every citizen. Additionally, the true character of a candidate is every bit as important as the issues, along with his/her qualifications and expertise because, in the long run, only impeccable character will be able to carry anything through. Confucius taught that no government can be better than the character of its rulers and further, if our politics are not based on agreed upon moral truths they will not stand.

    

I’ve read and heard too much banter about our system of government being broken when, in fact, that could only be proven if the system was being utilized the way it was originally set up to run. My feeling is that too many people have taken potshots at our government and policing and have never actually tried to follow the system. This is particularly true with the way we handle illegal immigration. Perhaps our implementers and policing is broken. Picture a crippled man trying to ride a bike that is in running condition and you’re closer to the truth of what is happening. No one who comes to the United States should ever be treated like they don’t belong here unless that person is a convicted fugitive already.

     That being said, when I picked the book back up and finished it I suddenly realized that Comey practically sent me a message personally. It’s personal for all of us who love our country because of the form of government our forefathers set up. We don’t live here simply because we were born here. We’re here because we’re guaranteed privileges, rights and freedoms that no other country offers and we can also contribute to them as well. All of that comes with a responsibility toward our highest moral goals, however. If we are Americans- free and proud then we’re going to have to show that we have something to be proud of, don’t we?

     Do I recommend this book? It should be required reading for every person currently residing in the U.S. It will give you a good reason to become literate in English. Welcome to the land of the free and the home of the brave.

A Lesson in Art Appreciation

  More than a month ago GMA aired a video that not only shocked me but once I took in more details on the internet, absolutely outraged me. If you have just watched it above this entry I will explain briefly that a woman took her child into the art gallery portion of Overland Park Museum in Kansas then proceeded to sit down and let her child run all over the museum with some other woman’s kid until he ended up pulling down a sculpture worth $132,000 narrowly escaping getting crushed himself. She proceeded to saunter over where her child had moved away from what he’d done. When she finally made it over to where her child appeared to be in shock, but okay, he ran away from her!

     The gallery had it all on videotape, obviously, and she originally told them she would pay for the damages until she found out what it was worth! She sent GMA her own homemade video at a later time stating that she felt the museum was negligent in displaying a piece of art so expensive where children were allowed to visit! Then she said she was sure that her child could’ve been killed. I’ve looked at this from all sides, including what the artist must think of a woman who lets her child roam around in an art gallery, unsupervised and being quite capable of creating this kind of damage. (Parents, especially mothers, do know this about their children whether they’re willing to admit it or not.) Not once did she mention anything about the artist or the destruction of his work. In case someone may be rather misinformed (or perhaps uninitiated), I will say that when you go into an art gallery or salon you are looking at somebody’s hard work and also their property. If you have no respect for that, you shouldn’t be there. Most museums are not a child’s playground and I don’t consider this occasion a normal way for children to behave themselves anywhere, personally.

     My first reaction was this and I have not changed my mind yet: Why was she not directly supervising her child at close range? Are we all to believe that she didn’t know he was capable of doing this? These are the same questions that the art gallery officials must have asked because they charged her with negligence in supervising her child. She adamantly denies what is as plain as the video itself. By taking this stance she has inexcusably taught her child two things. One is showing no respect for other people’s property. Were they at home? Somebody’s house? The mall? (And would that make a difference?) The second thing she has taught him is not to take responsibility for one’s actions. That’s why he ran away from her!

     Since that time the museum settled this through their respective insurance companies so hopefully the artist has been compensated financially. There are two points I want to make in conclusion, however. First is the damaged art which can’t ever really be replaced. That art is the artist’s baby, Ms Negligence and it’s been destroyed. A price tag on it can’t replace it. Value of art is intrinsic and extrinsic and is not truly meant to be replicated. If the artist tries to recreate the piece of art it will be different. That may not mean anything to you but it will eventually to the artist. Second, if you can’t see value in the art destroyed as something reserved by the person who created it then I would suggest that you keep yourself and your child away from the places where fine art is displayed. Either that or start teaching your child how to act when you’re not at home. You’ll probably be spending more time in a doctor’s office, anyway, until and unless you start taking some responsibility for what he does. A child lives what he learns. 

Oh, if he only had a brain...

   Max Boot, a columnist for the Washington Post, recently put in a bid in his column to explain briefly why he has officially switched his party affiliation from republicanism to being a democrat with conservative leanings. He explained very succinctly his reasons in his article how Trump has disillusioned his far-back reaching political leanings to the time when Lincoln was in office! It doesn’t get more GOP than that, you know and I’m sure his forthcoming book, “The Corrosion of Conservatism: Why I Left the Right” explains in further detail about his background and why he is certain he has made the right decision.

     I have noted a few things Boot mentioned which I feel are more than potent reasons why Trump should not remain in the presidential office. These were: constant rampant conflicts of interest, the alienation of America’s allies (a big issue to me) and last but not least- the appeasement of dictators. He wrote more than a few words about the unconscionable decision to separate undocumented immigrants from their children upon arrest and deportation of the adults. I agreed with everything Boot wrote and would add something of great interest to the general public. (More about that at the conclusion…)

     The fact that Trump does not speak for the majority of Americans wishes is all too obvious. If marches are any indication he should be ashamed of his record of angering nearly every American in the U.S. This man cannot even agree and be civil with our long time and more recent allies. When Putin tells me they didn’t do it I’d believe him over Trump any day. This Russian president has been quite clear and direct about it but has not offered any help in finding the true perpetrators but that is probably because Trump’s bullishness and outrageous accusations put his back up and I can tell that Putin doesn’t like that- but does anybody like being treated that way? 

     As far as Jong Un is concerned- Yes, Jong Un is his first name and Kim is the last - I would challenge Trump to make a return visit to North Korea to see if any denuclearization is taking place. There are those who doubt it and even Trump’s returning words about the deal sounded dubious. They had no way of speaking directly to each other but when I watched them interact on T.V. the body and facial language told a story all its own. Talk about mutual lack of respect! Anyone who has lived under it though, would tell you that this is the general deportment of dictators- or would-be dictators, at any rate!

     In the same paper from last week I found a small item which will interest those who have been separated from their children or those who are concerned about this issue. In Hanover, New Hampshire a mother bear was captured a little over two weeks ago and relocated by Fish and Game Department officials after people apparently complained that she and her four cubs were raiding trash bins and bird feeders around the Dartmouth College area. Instead of transporting her cubs, as well, they decided to take them to a center that keeps orphaned animals!

     When they released the mother bear close to the Canadian border they had her tagged with a tracking collar and they have discovered that she is on the move and has traveled 70 miles, so far, and moving in the direction of her previous location- most likely trying to find the cubs she was separated from. Mr Timmons, the bear project leader for the area told the Valley News that he expected her to return and is now feeling a bit guilty for following the local, state and federal laws concerning bears!

     By now you’re seeing a straight correlation of what can go wrong when laws that don’t take everything into consideration suddenly has to deal with the consequences of taking action in accordance with those laws. I can tell you that a mother bear deprived of her cubs or facing down anything that would threaten them in anyway has a bear to deal with and that’s nothing to joke about or flout. Besides being inhumane I think that it is shameful that a law could do so much damage rather than help any living being. I’ll tell you this- I pity the fool who tries to keep that mother bear from getting her cubs back. Do the right thing and save yourself !  

      Let’s hope immigrants have the same type of instincts in finding their children. That’s a problem no law has any right to mess with- just ask mama bear!  

The Castle Lady

Summertime is Here !

   

  First off, I just want to say Congratulations to the Warriors for a spectacular performance and win of the championships tonight at Oracle and also to Kevin Durant for his second MVP Finals award. It is certainly deserving and I'm glad you received it this year, too ! I'm sure there are going to be many more in the future! Kudos also to all the Cavaliers who put up a valiant fight. You live up to your name for sure. I should know- I'm The Castle Lady ! What a great way to kick off summer in a big way ! !

     Every season, so far this year, has arrived early and it appears that summer is going to be no different. I’ve planted a brand new flower garden on the south side of my house this year so it’s going to be exciting to see what all comes up. Hopefully it will discourage all the weeds that have grown there in the past. Can one defeat weeds with seeds? Well, I’m certainly going to find out! I’ve zapped those weeds relentlessly for quite a number of years now and since I had some good bare ground for a change I decided on flowers rather than try to put in a lawn where no one will appreciate it. I even made a pretty path to go along with it of small flagstones (donated by my aunt Anne) and I may even put in a garden stool or small bench if there is enough space. For now, I’m watering, watering and watering and waiting. Some seedlings are coming up so it’s starting to take on some shape of an actual garden. It’s certainly making early June a little more interesting.

     You know it’s been many years since I actively have roller-skated anywhere because so many of Denver rinks have shut down over the years. My introduction to the sport was during one of my earliest summers where I just strapped some metal skates onto my shoes- with metal wheels, mind you!- which I got as a gift the previous Christmas. Talk about a take-off! I don’t remember a single fall with them on and they were my greatest toy for one summer. The ice cream man going by? Put the skates on quick! It was the only way to meet up with friends, find an empty parking lot or space somewhere and pretend we were at a skating rink. That was one summer.

     I never used them again. Many years later…after High School was over, after I’d gone to Opportunity School and was working as a professionally licensed nail tech I noticed that in California grown people were putting on professional-looking skates with new types of wheels made out of polyurethane. They were colorful and they dance skated in them so it really caught my attention. When I moved out to California I spent every weekend skating on the boardwalk at the beach in my own customized pair. I also went to roller rinks and roller disco parties in them. Roller-skating grew up for me in a very real way.

     When I moved back to Denver I kept skating at various different rinks and had gotten quite good at it. For a good twenty years I kept it as a very important and regular part of recreation in my spare time. The roller rinks began to shut down and even now there are almost none. When I heard that the rink which I had started roller-skating at as an adult was being revamped for its old purpose very recently I made a mental note. I haven’t actually gone through those doors yet because it’s been eighteen years since I last skated, I’ll bet! I’m going to challenge myself to go back to it because I’ll bet it’s like riding a bike. You know. You never forget, right?

     Well, I can’t think of anything better to get me away from everything- aside from going to see a movie which is also a rare thing for me to do.
Skating was the impetus of one summer many years ago, so I believe I’m going to let it be that one thing you just never want to give up doing. I could stick with the patterns I’ve let my life fall into or I can just go all the way back to one summer in the sixties and be myself once again. Summer time is HERE ! Here we go…

The Castle Lady

Barbie Does Basketball !

     We’ve reached the Finals of the NBA championships and watched last night’s Game 1 to see the usual struggle between LeBron’s vulnerable ego doing battle with the Warriors insistence on humbleness. The game alone is enough entertainment especially since Shaq and Barkley had their laugh about the Benny Hill antics that go on when chaos clashes with insistence on order. (Their take on the new basketball!) I don’t see why anyone would purposely miss these games because the entertainment value is high. If you’re not watching you’re really missing out- I just had to say that! However, I can’t stand it when someone really gets hurt. That’s what happened in the first quarter between Klay Thompson and J.R. Smith. Before anyone could stop it J.R. slipped (probably on someone’s pool of sweat), colliding with Klay who had just taken possession of the ball, tripping him and he twisted radically, slamming down sideways on his right hip. Thompson tried to get up and apparently was in such pain all he could do was slam his fists on the wood floor. AUGH!

     That mishap sent him out limping to the locker rooms for the remainder of the quarter but luckily returned by the second quarter to make a round of perfect shots in the basket for the remainder of the game. His resilience alone is commendable but it made me wonder just how much daily pain these athletes endure over the love of the game. Who says they don’t earn their money ?

     At any rate, I watched a real tug of war for hours with the scores reflecting the struggle quite well. The Cavaliers and Warriors were head to head throughout the entire game. Durant really shined in this game. I noticed that Dramond Green tried to give LeBron a facial when he was trying to do a slam dunk. One word of advice to Dramond: Try to stay as far away from LeBron as you can during the remainder of the finals.

    

When the game went into overtime a sudden burst of perfect shots put the Warriors way ahead of the Cavs and you could see shock registered on the faces of the Cavs. Meanwhile, the Warriors were clearly rejoicing. When two and half seconds were left on the extended clock LeBron and Steph Curry decided to have a chat which escalated into a fast fight between several of the Cavs and several of the Warriors. There was enough time for it, wasn’t there? This was all started because Tristan Thompson had just been ejected from the game for unnecessary roughness. The ref actually started the fight, in truth. How important was it to eject a player when by all rights and purposes the game was over, pal?

     I think the NBA needs to call all the refs down on the carpet and start laying down some rules for them. Often their calls are way off, especially on fouls. It’s so bad, in fact, that I’m beginning to wonder what constitutes a foul. Even commentators are bringing this issue up on a regular basis and it’s definitely high time they have a conference between the players, coaches and refs and get their wires uncrossed. Those rules are in place to protect players, basically, so they have every right to question bad calls. Often they are quite justified in doing so and they should be included in these talks. It’s time to have it out. Right?

www.nba.com

Just my two cents worth !

The Castle Lady

Wild May !

The Road goes ever on and on

Down from the door where it began.

Now far ahead the Road has gone,

And I must follow, if I can,

Pursuing it with weary feet,

Until it joins some larger way,

Where many paths and errands meet.

And whither then? I cannot say.

from Book One of The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien

     May has been so up and down, sideways and inside-out that I’m beginning to wonder how we arrived at the 31st this quick. Personally, my month has been wilder than a box full of hungry kittens ! On the tenth of May I was able to finally conduct an interment of my dear mother’s remains and the date seemed as good as any, specifically before or after Mother’s Day. I have been trying to get my life back in order since that day and have lost precious writing time which I’ll never be able to recoup. It has reminded me of the words of Bilbo Baggins which Frodo remembers before he starts his own adventures outside of The Shire, in the very beginning of the first book of Lord of the Rings (i.e. The Fellowship of the Ring):

     “It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your door,” he used to say. “You step into the Road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to.”

     During this most reflective of passages something deeply profound is conveyed which has stuck with me and reminds one that you can make a difference in your life and the lives around you no matter where you end up or land. It is simply that, in life, ‘there is only one road; that it is like a great river: its springs are at every doorstep and every path is its tributary.’ That paraphrase being said- the following account of my life from May 10, 2018 to May 23, 2018 shall be submitted with the idea in mind that you’ll get a glimpse into a period of my life which is devoid of any writing only because I couldn’t get my hands on something with which to write or when I did there was something infinitely more pressing that I had to do.

     Even though I was to preside over this informal interment of my mother’s urn (into the plot she spent more than a year paying for in installments in the 1970s) I was, in the words of the family service rep, ‘fashionably late’ but everything had been set up already when I arrived (canopy, seating, ground opened, etc.) and ready to roll, so to speak. Since I was in possession of Mom’s urn and sealed box everyone that attended had to wait about ten minutes for me to surrender the box and later while Ms. Seaton and her aides were able to position the vaulted box over the area where it was to be lowered. I read a poem, which is an entry on this blog, as a Mother’s Day tribute. (See, To My Mother, May 13^th entry)

     I gave everyone who attended a chance to speak and it was quite uplifting, for the most part, to hear what family members had to say. The gathering was unbelievably small but I hadn’t invited many people. I decided on family primarily, from which only a few invitees attended. I did not want to turn it into something Mom would rather skip herself but we all seemed to agree on one premise. Mom had a way of making sure the people around her felt loved. It was her gift and her mission in life, I believe. She had the following phrase printed on the back of her business cards some years after she started her salon (eventually turning out to be her mission statement) because she backed it up with chats which always centered on her faith in Jesus Christ with each and every customer. The phrase is, “Introducing Jesus to you is the best way I know to say “thank you”. John 3:16”. In her day, it was well-received by almost everyone. Today I’m not sure how it would be perceived- given the times- but it garnered a clientele which encompassed most of the neighborhood and included men’s haircuts in the bargain. She wasn’t a barber so Mom styled and permed men’s hair at a time when it was fashionable.

     Before the lowering of the vault with my mother’s urn and box inside I was given three roses to put inside the vault and put them around the box. I thought Mom would like that- she loved roses and I still maintain her rosebushes in memory of her. No one stayed to see the grave being sodded over and even I stood well back. I felt good about knowing that she was loved enough by me to make sure that her wishes were honored. It was my attempt and intention to try to make our investments in each other equal. I hope I made her proud that day.

     Afterward, the drive home was in bumper-to-bumper traffic and the hottest May 10^th in Denver since who-knows-when, I’m sure. At some point when I was less than a mile away from home I decided to briefly stop in a parking lot to get my bearings, take a break for something to drink and get a few dollar store items. When I restarted the car it kept cranking but the engine wouldn’t turn over! That’s never happened with my car that I can recollect. I’ve owned this car for 27 years and have only had regular maintenance and replacement parts put on it. I was stunned and was without cell phone service- I could see the time but couldn’t make any calls. Several people, for the next four hours, allowed me to use their cell phones to call AAA to get roadside assistance. First, a diagnostician came and went over everything that was within AAA scope of services. He said he couldn’t find anything wrong- other than the fact that it wouldn’t start. His solution was to have the car towed. By this time two hours had flown by and I was now exhausted. It took three more phone calls to get the tow people out and they also did a diagnosis on it just in case it decided to just start, I suppose. It sounded the same. Cranking but not turning over. The driver thought perhaps it was a fuel pump failure.

     Once we finally got going it should’ve only taken them another ten to fifteen minutes to get me and the car to my house. When we were half a mile from my house a garbage truck driver managed to knock off the driver’s side mirror off the tow truck with the garbage truck side mirror and it was completely shattered. It looked deliberate but who knows? Maybe the garbage truck driver was having a bad day or something. Did they exchange info and go on? No. The driver of the tow truck got upset and insisted on getting the police out to check it out. I agreed with him that it looked deliberate but stayed neutral. I just wanted to go home at this point. The AAA people came to give him support while we were waiting for police. After more than an hour the police finally ambled by and shook their heads ‘no’ and left. By this time I was just as desperate to get home as any homeless person ever was and I wanted to find out who I could get to work on the car. I sure didn’t plan on spending my entire afternoon in a parking lot or a tow truck!

     Five hours after I initially found out that my car wouldn’t start I was delivered home (1:30- 6:30 !) with my car deposited on my driveway and no prospects for being able to get anything more done that day. I needed to take a shower, eat something before my stomach gave up the ghost and try to figure out what I was going to do. Not exactly a happy camper was I. No one pays nearly $2,000 to be as unhappy as I was at that moment but in the ensuing days it got a little better and then much worse.

     By Sunday the 13^th I managed to contact a nearby car rental place which I have used before. It was perhaps the nicest thing I’ve done for myself in awhile so I decided to have it for the weekend and get my car towed first thing on Monday to a tire service place that also works on cars in general. I hate being without a car to drive. I receive regular e-mails from this particular rental car business that offer weekend getaway deals so I felt confident that it would be a good idea. One objective to this is that I had planned on going back to the cemetery to make sure everything was as it should be.

     I received no calls from AAA on this dilemma. As a matter of fact I was stunned when I called them about trying to get more help on this issue to be told by a phone attendant that even though I’ve been a loyal member for 39 years it was only basic ($55 a year!) and they didn’t offer more than what I’d received. Further, I could only get roadside assistance 3 times on the same issue. (I had just paid my membership on March 31^st so that’s the thanks I received after all these years!) No one at AAA has ever talked to me like that before so I chalked it up to today’s rampant apathy. Not happily, though! Preferential treatment to customer loyalty is almost a joke any more. Century Link is a prime example.

     After I got the brush off from AAA, I spent the next three days, before renting the car, combing through the Yellow Pages and trying to figure out what could possibly be wrong with my car which I tried to start several times while it sat in my driveway. On Sunday after I’d managed to get the rental car I got groceries initially because I also had happened to run out of almost everything by then. I took flowers from my own yard to my aunt Anne because I figured no one would visit her and I was right. I was the only person who showed up for Mother’s Day even though she’s not my parent. She has two grown, married children (with children) - my cousins- but she spent the day alone except for my visit.

     Once I finally found an auto repair that I thought would be able to handle the problem, I called AAA and set up my last free tow on Wednesday morning the 16^th, to have the car taken to Firestone and followed the tow truck in the rental all the way out there. All this time I had been looking through the internet at sites like RockAuto.com to find out what was available for parts on my 1990 car because its make and model were obsolete practically since the day that it showed up at the dealership where I bought it, (until 1997-unbeknownst to me!) Not for a minute did I think it was a simple matter of my battery being low because two people from AAA had supposedly done a thorough diagnosis on that issue back on the tenth.

     As soon as I got the car there they set up yet another diagnosis for the car even though I told them that AAA had already ran a battery of tests twice. Then I was told that they may not get to it that day. The next day at noon I received a call from a Firestone rep saying that the computer (?) needed to be replaced and that it happened to be the most expensive part on the car. Right at that moment something suddenly didn’t ‘smell’ right to me but since all the diagnosis on the car had come up with no clue as to the problem I had no real cause to doubt it at that point.

     Days went by and then a weekend while I went about the business of my life which is always filled with lots of physical work, necessary shopping I needed to accomplish and trying to get to my writing. I had wanted to get started ASAP on ordering a nice marker for Mom’s site and got a call from Kim at Fairmount on the 18^th- a Friday but I didn’t have any decisions made for her because I was trying to wrap my head around the delay to everything and what it could possibly cost me. If you’ll recall, I just got myself out of debt by the end of last year and managed to garner something to get my Mom in her plot. This was something I could not have foreseen and would not have even guessed at, leave alone planned. I had to put it off since I hadn’t been able to get in touch with my Dad since the day I’d seen him at the interment.

     A weekend went by and then I started to get concerned and started calling Firestone early Monday morning. I was put off ‘til Tuesday and decided that whether I had a car or not- the rental needed to go back to the rental place and I told them I was bringing the rental back on Tuesday. I had never planned to have it longer than the weekend so I knew it was going to get to vacation bill proportions. I had just got off the phone with the rental agency and now Firestone was telling me I could pick up the car immediately. I had to take the rental back after running the last errands I needed to for the day, have them drive me back home and take a bus out to the Firestone.

     When I went to take the bus to Firestone it had to start raining, of course, but I was prepared. I was shocked at what the final bill from Firestone was (hundreds!) and could only put it on a credit card. ARGH ! This put the total fiasco tally past $1,000. Hadn’t I just defeated something similar? So much for a marker on Mom’s grave. I suppose that’ll take another five years depending on how long it takes me to get out of debt again. Groan.

     The ensuing hours on the 22^nd were absolutely unbelievable! When I opened the car door to start it and go home I heard the weirdest noise I ever heard coming from the dash. I’d certainly never heard that before and when I turned the key to start the car it cranked for a long time before it finally started. The engine sounded the same as it did on the day of the 10^th on the ride home and showed no performance difference. The only difference was the noise that wouldn’t go away. When I got it home I turned off the ignition and the noise started again as soon as I opened the car door and took the key out of the ignition. I decided, on a hunch, to put the key in the ignition and close the door without trying to turn it on and the noise suddenly stopped. As soon as I took the key out of the ignition the noise started up. Two more tries with the door closed or opened revealed that the door had nothing to do with the sound.

     I was floored at this noisy new feature but had to go inside to get some pressing things done and went back out within fifteen minutes. The noise was still going and I tried to start the car. It was completely dead. I couldn’t even hear a click leave alone the ignition sound and every time I took the key out of the ignition the new noise started. To say the least, I was livid. The original problem was now even worse and I’d just paid a pile of money for a car I couldn’t start at all now! At that instant I knew that the computer had nothing to do with the car starting or not starting but was quite surprised that they hadn’t really fixed the problem at all.

      I went inside and called Firestone and told them what had happened including the noise. The phone attendant told me that they would send a tow truck in the morning, free of charge, to take it back to them and find out what the problem was which helped alleviate some of the aggravation but being as how I’d been without my car now for 12 days it was getting to be a bit much. When the tow truck driver called the next morning I told him what had happened the previous day and the past 2 week’s history. He called Firestone and then called here again and said that he would be towing it there and I was to talk to Murray when I got there. I let the tow truck driver hear the noise coming from my dash when he showed up and he didn’t seem at all surprised. I rode with the tow truck to Firestone and noticed before we pulled out of my driveway that he had put some device on my battery.

     When we got there I talked to Murray and then I believe he personally worked on my car. After only a short period of time he came into the waiting lobby of the store and said it was fine, no noise and it started immediately. He tore up the repair order and said he didn’t do anything. He brought me to my car and he said for me to start it myself. I opened the door and there was no more noise. When I finally got myself adjusted in my car correctly and turned the key it started right up like it always does. No extra, mysterious noise of any sort. He said he didn’t have to do anything except reconnect my battery cables and he just put them back on. (I would’ve never been able to start my car or gotten home with battery cables unconnected the previous evening!) I told him that the tow truck driver had hooked something up to the battery just before he towed my car and that was probably why the battery cables were disconnected.

     While I was driving home, I put two and two together and realized that the last tow truck driver was the person who solved the problem. My battery was most likely in need of attention and that was probably all that was wrong on the 10^th. Why that wasn’t detected by three diagnosticians is the real mystery. Meanwhile, I just spent $550 for a so-called computer I probably didn’t need to replace. I had asked Murray about why the attendant refused to let me take the parts taken off and he gave the same answer she did the previous night even though I was promised that I would be given back any parts taken off of my car. This was so it could be sent back to the factory they bought the new one from which they will rebuild (?) This is quite the deal for Firestone and a total and complete rip-off to the unsuspecting consumer. If that’s true why wouldn’t they offer a rebate to the car owner? Where’s my proof that they replaced anything or took anything off my car?

     Well, my car is starting like it always did but now I’m in debt when I shouldn’t be. Far be it for someone to admit they made a mistake and prevent the customer from paying dearly for it! What a contrast to the almost angelic people who let me use their cell phones to call for help! They didn’t have to help me but they did. It didn’t put a penny in their pockets to assure me and allow me to use their prized possessions. One grounds worker at the parking lot site even gave me a bottle of water because it was really hot that day. One of them assured me she would come back to see if AAA ever came! I’m so glad our paths intersected for even a few minutes or more. They helped keep me from having a day no one wants to endure after burying a loved one.

When you’re given a chance, lend a hand where you can !

The Castle Lady