Vacation's All I Ever Wanted

I think I might need a vacation from my life. If you've ever had one of those crossroads' moments that psychologists and psychiatrists are always talking about, then you know what I'm saying in that first sentence. However, there is often no escape from the life you lead. If you do escape it, the deception may well drive you inevitably to tears, madness or strange rebellion (i.e. midlife crisis. ) The escape may very well be less desirable, ultimately, than the forging ahead it takes to continue "as you were", as the English say.

I'm saying this for a different reason, however. When I wrote "vacation" I meant that literally, and the same for "my life". Most people need a vacation from their life at some point in time. Their major crossroads moment is a realization that they have given their life to either one single profession and may regret it. However, it may be that they went through a series of different professions or jobs and never really found anything they wanted to do. It really makes no difference. At some point in time a normal person will get tired, stop and look back and wonder why they made the choices that consist of their past. A quote I found recently from Dorothy Canfield Fisher puts this idea into its proper perspective.

"If we would only give, just once, the same amount of reflection to what we want to get out of life that we give to the question of what to do with a two week's vacation, we would be startled at our false standards and the aimless procession of our busy days."

This is why I believe it's never too early to start thinking about your likes, dislikes and recognizing your fantasies to see if they have the potential to become realities.

You'll notice I didn't say make your choices early. It takes time and patience to become the person you are meant to be- that's irreversible. You can change so many times in your life you may begin to believe you're in the middle of an identity crisis According to Clifford Odets- this series of changes is inevitable, but he went too far.

Here's my advice: Be ready for change. Write down your wildest fantasies. Walk towards your dreams- never walk in the other direction ( you know that's wrong, don't you?) , and keep your aspirations high. Don't compromise your dream if it's really specific. Those specifics are your true destiny and the fingerprint of your character. Always look up if you want to achieve great things and you won't fail.

Lastly, don't leave God out of the equation. You'll need Him when everyone else walks away.

The Castle Lady giving you a new perspective on life, love and happiness!

Quote for the day: If a man will begin in certainties he shall end in doubts;

but if he will be content to begin in doubts he shall end in certainties.

- Francis Bacon , English philosopher (1561-1626)

What's Age Got To Do With It?

Monet was painting great pictures at 86.

Titian put the last brush stroke to the "Battle of Lepanto" at 98; he finished his "Last Supper" at 99.

Goethe finished "Faust" at 81.

Tennyson wrote "Crossing the Bar" when he was 83.

Voltaire was still penning plays when he died at the age of 84.

Wagner wrote his finest operas in the final years of his life, "Parsifal" in the last year. He died at the age of 70.

At 74 Verdi composed his "Othello" and at 80 he produced his famous "Falstaff".

At 50 the mind hasn't yet reached its zenith. At 60 it is at its best and from then on declines so gradually that at 80 those who have kept themselves mentally alert can be just as productive as at 30. Memory may slip a bit, but judgment and reason may actually improve, and creative imagination is scarcely touched by age... - Marie Beynon Ray from "Action or Atrophy"

If the short essay above isn't enough to convince you that age and accomplishment are irrelevant I'm wondering what could possibly persuade you that indeed we can do many "impossible" tasks at any time of our lives.

I think it is true that many people do not fulfill their destiny in life. It is a sad note but often true. The extraordinary people listed above were not just exceptional in their abilities- they also had something in common with each other AND us. They were also ordinary people. Yes, you read that right. They were ordinary. If you can be extraordinary you have to start with ordinary.

People want inaccessible heroes- not far from the Superman fantasy but this is not practical and I believe we need to stop expecting our heroes to be perfect in every way. It's not normal and it's rather annoying, when you really get down to it, that we've set these people apart from us. Get them off that pedestal and start talking because you never know when you may have to fill those shoes some day yourself.

You don't want to be left not knowing what to do now, do you?

The Castle Lady sends wishes and greetings that are timeless!

http://www.ilovecastles.com/
http://castlelady.spaces.live.com/

Quote for the day: Age is strictly a case of mind over matter.

If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

-Jack Benny (1894-1974)

Viva la Diva(s)!

We know who we are. We know who is not. It's as simple as that. When it comes to singing I'm a Diva, when it comes to writing I can hold my own, when it comes to looks- I clean up very well. Most of the singers today are not divas, I don't care how well you think they sing. A diva doesn't belt out anything, she doesn't "toss one off", when it comes to looks she's got the goods, she delivers with finesse what she does well. Period.

I read an article recently on Raquel Welch whom I've followed closely since she made a series of tapes on Yoga exercise. ( I still follow her routine even though the videotapes were worn to a frazzle years ago! ) I agree with her philosophies on many counts and I just think she's the most amazing-looking woman I have ever seen at any age- she happens to be 66. Yes. You read that right.

She still looks twenty six. I don't know if it's our mutual birthday (September fifth) or the fact that we both can hold our own in the sexy department but I think we both have a secret we're not telling anyone. I hope I look like that at 66 because it will be the best revenge I could ever exact on a world of females who seem to think that you can't look amazing without buying every cream, shooting up botox like a heroin-addict, gulping tons of vitamins, exercising like a man, sucking the fat out and starving yourself to death. Boy! Talk about not getting it!

I heartily recommend a book Raquel wrote in 1984, "Total Beauty and Fitness", which outlines the exercises she did in her videotapes and her advice on everything- eating, sleeping, working and play. It's all basically good sense living and taking your health seriously. I have never been much of a trend follower and apparently neither has she, which is refreshing.

Here is a series of sentences she was quoted in the article and I can wholeheartedly say that she took the words right out of my mouth:

( On insisting that she never imagined herself to be a sex symbol )...,"I couldn't ditch the momentum. After the first five years, you get sick of it. It all looks so seductive from the outside , but it's hard to age. It shows vulnerability. The fantasy isn't supposed to be vulnerable, baby! I've never OD'd or been through rehab. So much attention has been paid to my pulchritude, from high school 'til now, I've just adapted to the way the world perceives me. I often think, 'what was it that made people focus on me?' I didn't look like a pushover. I was formidable. I looked like I was a challenge to men, like they'd have to conquer me. I say, you have to be who it is you are and stick to it." Amen.

While Raquel has gone through her fourth divorce I have yet to be married. I've also never been required to crawl over rocks in fur bikinis. I don't think anybody could've ever influenced me to do that- but we're different people- I remind myself.

Well, we both have a similar secret but I'm not going to give it away blatantly. She didn't, why should I? There is a name for it though. It's called good genes, happiness and being genuine. Read and weep.

The (one and only) Castle Lady embraces you with trade secrets! Mmwwaaah!

http://www.ilovecastles.com/
http://castlelady.spaces.live.com/

Got Character?

The following excerpt from a horoscope in the Rocky Mountain News for my "sign" was run recently which caught my attention. To be honest, my feeling is that occult information is something less than scientific and I am putting that as nicely as I can. However, this one seemed to me to be more of a character analysis and I thought it was rather apt in my case, so I cut it out. Here it is:

"You have what it takes to unwind situations that companions have muddled up in some manner, doing so in a way that doesn't make them feel stupid or irresponsible for having caused it."

A woman by the name of Bernice Bede Osol wrote this little gem. This sums me up rather nicely and so I will keep it and cherish it. Doesn't this seem like it would be very successful in relationships? It has been on many occasions but not always. The truth is, a lot depends on the character of the people you choose for companions. I am a rather trusting individual even for someone of my age and rank so I have been discouraged more than a few times in this manner. One reason is because this type of untangling often is done and the people responsible for the situations are insensitive to the problems they cause ( d ).

It makes me think of something my grandmother used to repeat often. "People make their own trouble." I have found that in many cases her saying was right. In addition, these same people, because they can't see beyond their own nose, are oblivious to the trouble they cause themselves- and others, often, as a result. According to some books I've read on psychoanalysis, interpersonal communication and psychiatry this tendency to overlook responsibility in its advanced form becomes a character or personality disorder. They go from ignoring their own "baggage", to start shifting blame on the most likely person available. Their excuses become convoluted stories meant only to baffle and befuddle people and prevent all from seeing the truth. Truth sends them scurrying away.

Several times in my life I have come across an occasional person such as this and they are beyond difficult cases. I will let my endeavor go as far as I feel I can and if it succeeds, fine. If it doesn't, I remind myself of another adage my grandmother used to say. "You can't please everyone." Then there is also Ricky Nelson who sang, "You see, you can't please everyone so you got to please yourself." ; )

The Castle Lady osculating your way!

Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in a light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it. - Maurice Chevalier

Don't get your wires crossed!

Over Memorial Day weekend I had the wonderful chance to meet a friend and his fiancée from Lille, France for dinner at my favorite Chinese restaurant here in my hometown! When they arrived last Tuesday the weather had gone unseasonably cold and rainy, which is highly unusual. Normally we don't get rain until June. It wasn't a good start for a vacation here but by the next day it cleared up- which is also typical and they had sunny weather during most of their stay.
Besides getting to know each other a little better we discussed their daytrips they had made- we have a lot of natural sights for sightseeing and mountain town casinos- and my trip to the movies to see Paris, Je t'aime. We had a great time getting to know each other. Since they are French-speaking I gave them a chance to use their English which they both spoke very well with their charming accents, of course. I didn't use much of my French because I feel like I sound like a child and then I lose confidence if the conversation is long term. Quel dommage!
Somehow we got onto the subject of the price of gas here, and I was surprised to learn that it's even higher in Europe and significantly. Somehow, I thought maybe they had escaped the increases. Not the case, in fact, they said the taxes were high on the gas (as much as 20% !)
When I mentioned that our prices may go up to four dollars a gallon I saw an unusual amount of surprise on their face but not for the reason I thought. Eventually the fiancée of my friend asked me how many liters there were to a gallon. My brain stalled, of course. Doesn't every American get this way any time we're asked to actually convert the "old way" (which not a soul ever gave up, truth!) to metric ? I tried to do a rough conversion in my head starting with what I knew.
"Hmmm. Okay it's ten liters to 2.64 gallons. Divide ten into 2.64.... no , that won't work ! Uh. Start over. Divide into five shares to correspond with 2.64 gallons and you get... would it be four parts making it 2.5 per share or five parts making it two per share?? Augh."
I think I came up with something like 1 and a half liters to a gallon. We all looked confused. Probably none of us came up with the right numbers in our heads.
Today I finally sat down with pen and paper and didn't quit trying to figure it out until I was sure I came up with the solution. The closest I could get was that a quarter of a gallon corresponds to one liter but it's not accurate. I realized (for the first time) that customs of a country are intrinsic and really cannot be changed. I remember when I was going to elementary school the principal and teachers said they were dedicated to getting our generation to use the metric system and drop the old method of measure. However, I still hear people, much younger than myself, talking about inches, feet, yards, gallons, miles etc.
Now try to think of this as a language and you have a pretty good idea of what is so difficult about learning the subtle nuances in a language. How about strange words that escape people trying to learn a foreign language, or worse yet, master it? As Mozart said in the movie Amadeus, in some parts of the world people talk backwards. Not literally, mind you, like he meant, but more on an etymology basis. That is to say- the meanings and reformations of words. Black Americans talk backwards. They say things are good when they mean bad, and they say things are bad when they mean they are good. That's just the start. My favorite English usage is to say "that's no joke" and basically mean it's not quite to be laughed at but you're laughing anyway because it's amusing. Confused? That's because English is not your first language. Try to hang, will you? ; )

The Castle Lady will smooch away your blues!

What is newsworthy?

     About a month ago I took it upon myself to check out a children's book that I thought might be worthy of recommending on my main blog. The title of it is The Young Journalist's Book and the author is Guthrie Bentley. It is a great book to pitch towards children who have a knack or bent toward writing and although it is not comprehensive in supplying all needed information, it is informative enough to get any young person started in the writing life. I applauded the author for making the distinction between "hard news" and "feature" or "human interest" stories.  "Stories" being the key word here, a few fairly current controversies suggest that a line has been blurred between non-fiction and fiction but if you've ever been in a position of writing a "hard news" story there is no mistaking the difference. It's like night and day. This is not only getting at the facts- it is pressing in for detailed information that the "private" sector often wishes to keep concealed- whether the said information concerns the general public or not.  

     It has not escaped my attention that prior to the decease of a well-known newspaper maven in the U.S. (of Scripps/Howard fame), the local version of his paper here in Denver, The Rocky Mountain News, started to look and read like a tabloid. I'm not surprised. Tabloids probably outsell regular hard news carriers two to one. Actually, the numbers may be better than that since I haven't had the opportunity to check stats.

     At any rate, it includes enough detail of the elements that go into a regular newspaper which might run a few features now and then. I believe that most people pick up a paper to find out what's really going on and are not necessarily wanting something to make them "feel good" about the world. Not to say that there is anything wrong with that, but when you are looking for facts, opinions often disappoint. Most people pick up a paper expecting to read hard news.

     An amusing point on this is made in the book when it cites a quote made by Charles A. Dana who was a journalist for the New York Sun back in 1882. He said: "When a dog bites a man, that is not news; but when a man bites a dog, that is news." Isn't that an excellent point besides being amusing? Well, that being said I will go on with my point. It is simply that we must be clear about what we are writing when one sits down at computer, writing pad or typewriter. Dan Brown expressed real concern for people that used his book as a hard refutation of the facts of Jesus life. His words were along the lines of, 'what part of "fiction book" did they not get'? That is certainly enough for me. As far as a writers' veracity of non-fiction or biography- perhaps the publishing houses ought to employ more fact checkers. That might clear up the problem altogether! Truth is the most newsworthy item in my opinion.

    

    

 Feel loved!

The Castle Lady

Hollywood? Don't get me started...

Doris Day, glamour & class


Is it just my imagination or does Jonathan Rhys Myers look nothing like the real Henry the Eighth just as Kirsten Dunst is a dead ringer for Sarah Bernhardt? See and compare their photos in the new celebrity album I've added to my Castlelady blog. http://castlelady.spaces.live.com
In other news I'd like to know when Paris Hilton ever showed any reason for us to think she's a decent person who shouldn't have to spend any time in jail. Perhaps everyone has forgotten that the only reason why anyone knows her name is because she and her boyfriend of the moment made a tape of the two of them having sex. (All three seconds of it, I guess.) Since then it's been a long string of photos of her doing pretty much nothing which is what she's best at doing, I suppose. You can see a disgusting photo of her letting men take photos of her twat with their camera phone while she dances on a glass bar table in the celebrity album. She makes Madonna look like a decent person- until we think again of her book SEX. I wonder what her daughter is going to think- years from now -when someone pulls out the book to show everyone at one of the "birthday parties" Lourdes will inevitably attend. Hoo boy! (No I didn't put any photos of her in the album. She doesn't need any of my help in keeping her name mentioned every two seconds somewhere.) Oops. Hah!
Is anybody tired of Angelina Jolie desperately trying to make herself look like a savior? Since when is adopting children in other countries some ticket to the promised land? In all the photos I've seen of her with these kids she doesn't even look at them. They appear to be fashion accessories. This reminds me of Joan Crawford, ironically. If you're clueless about that story, check out the book "Mommie Dearest" by Christina Crawford at your local library.
I think it's time some real heroes to get laudits for what they do every day of the week. I think of those who bravely face an increasingly hostile world, sometimes in their own household. We who clean up after an ungrateful world. Those who work forty to fifty hours a week and eke by with lives that hardly come close to these spoiled and pampered overgrown brats who've never worked an honest job in their life. To the women who are equally or more beautiful and don't make a dime for being just that- I salute you. You're more beautiful than you realize. Don't compare yourself to these women. They had to sell their soul to get where they are, and that's just too steep a price to pay, in my estimation. Be glad you don't have to play these high-powered games they go through and thank the good Lord for every blessing you have. In some parts of this world they are forcing little girls to have sex with men for nothing more than a chance to live one more day.
Many people are worse off than you could ever imagine.

The Castle Lady blowing off steam and many kisses your way...

My Aim is True

The Castle Lady

The world does not comprehend laughter, it can only participate in complete bafflement

- Evelyn M. Wallace , September 15, 2006

The above is a quote I wrote on a friends blog last year when it became apparent to me that his girlfriend's sense of humor was lacking some character and he was beginning to follow suit. The friendship went sour. Can you imagine why? Duh!

I don't like the idea of dissecting the creation of comedy- much like Bob Newhart- because you never really know where it's coming from, in truth. (Please see the quote from Pirandello in the latest entry on my Castlelady blog

No doubt there is a hidden science to it but do we really want to make something like that out of it?

Where does laughter come from? Can anyone actually pin down this phenomenon to emotion? It is not necessarily an emotion, nor can anyone say what will evoke the outbursts of what we call laughter. We have seen absurdities (or what we term as such) elicit this response but we have also seen gales of it produced from mundane and often abhorrent situations. When laughter is thought to be inappropriate we believe the "laugher" to be abnormal or weird. If we perceive that someone seldom laughs or smiles at anything they are termed as not having a "sense of humor". Which only leads us back to the question of what humor actually consists of or where it comes from.

I believe that laughter comes from a place inside us that God placed there and each person gets an individual imprint of what he or she finds funny or absurd. It is very much like our fingerprints. I think I would like to call it our "waggish DNA" because each and every person finds something funny that very few other people find funny or even amusing, at times. It can create awkward moments, certainly. But ask yourself this- would you want to change your sense of humor to conform to someone else's standard? A better question might be- do you think this is even possible? I don't believe so and I think any one that would try to do so would be nothing less than false. Fake laughter stinks like herring that has been sitting on a wharf for several years. It's bad.

Perhaps someday they'll get really sophisticated about comedy training and have someone do lab tests, experiment and come up with some antidote to the "crawl under the table and crawl out" of the club moment that a few people have experienced at The Comedy Club (or local equivalent). Perhaps some comedian with a PhD in comedy will be able to tell us how to get our "waggish DNA" under control and we'll someday be able to take classes in comedic etiquette.

Until that day I'll just go on laughing at what I find funny and express myself in the most appropriate way I know. If my words offend, well, I am really sorry but it's the nicest way I could put that and retain my sense of humor. When I really want to offend you'll know it in no uncertain terms.

My aim is true. ; )

Live, love, laugh, hug and kiss!

The Castle Lady
http://www.ilovecastles.com/
http://castlelady.spaces.live.com/

Decisions, decisions, decisions....

Ever have one of those moments when you are totally overwhelmed in making a decision because you have too many options and wonderful choices? If I used a platitude for this it would be "I feel like a kid in a candy shop that offers every confection known to man."

Well, this past April I set out to the task of putting no less than fifteen "romantic" castles on my Castle Lady spaces blog and wound up covering about five, total. They were not well known castles such as Neuschwanstein, Windsor, Belvoir, Warwick, Edinburgh, Lichtenstein, Versailles, Chambord, Dublin, or Blarney.

The truth is I just had a difficult time deciding on the fifteen castles in question because the number of castles is staggering and then... I just ran out of time. I reimmersed myself in the research I did for five years and suddenly realized two weeks had run past my nose while trying to make the decision.

I've fallen in love all over again with all of the castles, some of which you have probably never heard of, but because of their unique place or features should be right up there with the "well-known" castles.

It made me realize how important these books will be, and not just on an esthetic level. On a deeper level these magnificent monuments to the past are revelatory exercises in the treasure trove history offers us. They are the menhirs of our ancestors struggles- together and apart. Most of all, they speak to us of ourselves. Man does not shed his past, genetics or lineage without great struggles and even then he may not. Indeed, I believe in the closing of his life, he must embrace and face all three and with bravery.

Therefore, I have decided on two principles in the making of the "Castle Lover's Guides TM" The first is that "famous" is not the all-consuming passion that will drive me forward into production and the second is that there is no such thing as an insignificant castle, story or historical person. For the time being, I'll keep the word insignificant out of my vocabulary.

The Castle Lady sends warm kisses and hugs! Mwaah!

http://www.ilovecastles.com/
http://castlelady.spaces.live.com/

Ah! May Day! Such splendour, such...

 

     I believe there once was a grand tradition in the United States for May Day. For all I know there may still be some traditions carried out in various parts of the country- unbeknownst to me. I can't remember a single May first that had any specific rite in my family or any social circles I may have been a part of during the years I have spent in Colorado but there is no doubt there is something special about it. Anyone with a working olfactory nerve and time to take a walk can tell you that!

     Since I have been doing more international instant messaging and putting more and more of my work on the internet I am coming to realize that Europeans treat it as a real event and holiday. For instance, today in France many people will buy a bouquet of Muguet des Bois (for us it is Lily of the Valley) for someone they love. Russia used the day to denote a special day for women which went international. They refer to it as Women's Day and is meant for the support for women in all walks of life as a day of independence. It believe it was also meant as a support for women by women. I like to remind myself that while it's good to feel that men take an interest in women's rights and support them, there's nothing like knowing that other women are looking out for you and your best interests because there is a common bond. We have been oppressed and we're never going to let that happen again.

      So, May Day for me has a special meaning. One of hope in sisterhood and one of eternal hope in the life that God set in motion when he made Eve out of Adam. What clever pieces of art we are, no matter our shape, color, size or brand!

 

 

     Evelyn Wallace          Kisses and hugs from your sister!

The Castle Lady